Mother and father are to be replaced by the terms parent 1 and parent 2. Are children losing their mother and father or is this just unnecessary hysteria?
We only care about kids from the right families?
The stormy topic of parent 1 and parent 2 is always heard, along with the warning that this will make children lose the right to their mother and father. And we don't just hear it in debates in parliament and on the television screen. For example, part of the invitation to the Mass in the Trebic Basilica - which should be an event full of Christian love and mutual understanding - includes a paragraph headed 'Mother and father or parent 1 and parent 2?', which scares: 'Children are becoming commodities, mothers are becoming incubators for the wishes of homosexual couples. Support the petition to put the rights of the child first. Your signature will show politicians that children matter."
If the discussion about Parent 1 and Parent 2 is similarly reduced, it's clear that it will make some of society nervous. Especially the part that has the ultra-conservative agenda drummed into their heads from pulpits and is encouraged to sign a petition demanding a constitutional definition of marriage as the exclusive union of a man and a woman when they visit a church. But the introduction of such a definition would show one thing: that some of the children of our society do not matter at all.
Every child has two parents, only rainbow children have one
The point of trying to have 1 parent and 2 parents is not just a play on words. This change should come along with the right of children of same-sex couples to have both parents listed on official documents. It would mean that rainbow children would get the same legal protections that other children have - both their parents would have rights and responsibilities to them, children would have the right to an orphan's pension and inheritance from both their parents, and they would not lose contact with the parent they don't have on their paperwork in the event of a relationship breakdown.
Today, the status of a child from a two-woman or two-man family is such that he or she has only one parent written in the official documents. Usually it is the biological parent, in the case of adoption from an orphanage it is simply one of the couple (the partners can draw the shorter match, for example). The other - the social or de facto parent - is physically present in the child's life, but not officially. It simply hovers somewhere in the legal space between parent and stranger. He or she has certain obligations towards the child arising from the fact that they live together in a shared household. If the adults' relationship breaks down and they are unable to reasonably agree on contact with the child, the social parent will have the status of an "additional close person" in court. Neither a complete stranger nor completely ours. Sort of like the Queen's Scooter fairy tale.
Behind the fight over parent 1 and parent 2 is the desire to prevent gays and lesbians from having children.
Children of gay and lesbian couples are being born and will continue to be born. There is no pandering involved. On the contrary, it can be said that the rainbow children are the most desirable ones because their parents face many obstacles in starting a family. Every rainbow child is planned. They do not come unexpectedly, as happens with the offspring of heterosexual couples.
Surrogate parenthood, alluded to in the warning addressed to Trebic parishioners with the words "mothers become incubators", was created as a solution for infertile heterosexual couples. Czech gay couples are opting for it abroad, where, unlike in the Czech Republic, surrogacy is legally treated, professionally conducted and all those involved undergo psychological tests. Above all, let us not forget that Czech gay couples successfully adopt children from orphanages, namely children of minority origin and with various types of disabilities that are not usually sought by the preferred heterosexual couples in the adoption process.
Zdroj: Giphy
A woman does not lose her maternity when she identifies as a parent 1
For example, if the Czech Republic succeeds in adopting marriage for all, which advanced to a second reading in the Chamber of Deputies last week, two spouses will also get the right to officially be parents of their children. But then when they fill out birth certificates, passport applications or school applications, they will get a pre-printed form with mother and father boxes. Does the other mother of the child write her name in the father box? Which of the gay fathers who have already adopted a hard-to-place child from a children's home should be written in the mother box? The renaming of the Parent 1 and Parent 2 boxes addresses just such situations.
And that is where the changes end. Even after the renaming of the boxes, every child will know which family he or she belongs to and who his or her relatives are. No heterosexual mother will harm her relationship with her child by putting her name in the Parent 1 box on the form. In a lesbian family, the child will continue to call his or her mother Mum, Mummy, or perhaps by a nickname or first name, because every family, regardless of the sexual orientation of the parents, has its own customs. In addition, some school forms have long used the wording legal guardian of the child and it hasn't hurt anyone's family yet. In fact, there are many children for whom the papers are signed by someone other than the mother and father, but for example by a grandmother or a social worker.
Get ready for gender-neutral language
So the whole issue is also part of the debate about gender-neutral language, the introduction of which requires the simple fact that social roles change over time. The words we use are very important because they show how we think about things. Therefore, striving for a language that does not exclude or exclude anyone is, after all, appropriate.
In 2017, for example, London Underground replaced the traditional "ladies and gentlemen" address in its announcements with the gender-neutral "hello everyone". In the Czech Republic, this news drew a classic wave of grins. We do not have this problem here, because on Prague's public transport we hear the inclusive message: 'Passengers please'. Gender-neutral parent 1 and parent 2 are based on the same principle. It is a fact that differentiating by numbers does not put both parents on exactly the same level, and in some couples there can be an argument about who is 1 and who is 2. The key to resolution may be, for example, which of the couple then serves the majority of the PTA at school.
