"Being different doesn't mean being worse or better," says the author of a children's book that fights bullying through animal stories
According to continuously collected data, bullying occurs in up to 40 % of Czech schools. Your book, however, targets the very youngest readers, children in kindergartens and the first grades of primary schools. Is it possible to encounter bullying there too?
Unfortunately, yes, bullying starts at an early age and occurs earlier and earlier, even in kindergartens. Children are bullied there because of visible differences, some because they are too skinny, others because they are too thin. Others are laughed at because of their droopy ears... Even such innocent taunts can play a crucial role in the further psychological development of a child, or even an adult.
Is it possible to explain the subject of bullying to children of such a young age?
I think that the animals, who are the main characters in my book, are ideal for explaining differences. Each one is different in some way and children can see these differences at a glance or already know them. The book features a good-looking but obese and very slow piglet, a distracted but honest hen, or a parrot that can't do a simple trot but sings beautifully. Moreover, children like animals, they know them and they simply understand that being different does not mean being worse or better, but unique.
Bullying takes many forms, of course, but it is basically physical and psychological. Physical I think everyone can imagine, including children. But is it possible to explain psychological bullying to them in a way they can understand?
Of course, children will not call what happens in a collective physical and psychological bullying. However, they are able to perceive from a very early age that someone is treating them in a way that they should not - even on a psychological level. But it is important to talk to children about this before they enter a larger group. Explain to them that if they don't like the way someone is treating them, they should talk to adults about it, not bottle it up. But unfortunately, that is exactly what many children do. They are ashamed of being hurt - physically or mentally.
So you wrote Animal School because children are often ashamed to confide in bullies, and the book should open up the subject in the family or in kindergarten?
The idea of writing a book where the differences of the animals are an allegory for the differences of the people actually came about quite a long time ago - when I was a child myself. It was in kindergarten and then in primary school that I started to notice the differences between children. And also that some of them mocked others for being different. It was then that I got the idea to connect the animal school and the human one and to show through animal heroes that being different is not a bad thing, but on the contrary makes life beautiful and colourful. That's exactly what children need to be told from an early age. If my book helps to do that even a little bit, it will be great.
Considering that we've known each other for "a while", let me ask you a more personal question - you were born with a cleft lip, which also brings with it a bit of difference in appearance. So - what about you and bullying?
Fortunately, I haven't experienced bullying myself, although I have been different in a number of ways. Apart from a congenital cleft lip, I was and actually still am (laughs) very small and clumsy compared to others. I also wore and still wear glasses, which are all "great reasons" for bullying. Fortunately, before entering kindergarten, my mother advised me - if I happened to be laughed at - to laugh back. Then, in my entire school career, only two classmates told me I had a "smash mouth". When I calmly replied "and you have a grin on your head again," it was calm. (laughs)
Small, clumsy, glasses - so is there any way of determining who is at higher risk of being bullied? What is the principle of bullying in general, who is usually the victim and who is the "perpetrator"?
One cannot directly say that the bullied is the victim and the bully - that is, the one who bullies - is the perpetrator. In fact, the bully is also the victim, usually a child who is not getting the attention and care he or she needs at home or elsewhere. It is precisely "through the bullying" of others that he or she wants to draw attention to himself or herself. It is also true that someone who is with a bully in one group may be a bully in another. There are no "rules" for this. Simply put, any difference is simply "punished" in a children's group in certain situations.
Of course, there can be countless differences, since LUI also deals with LGBTQ+ issues, it's clear that I'm interested to know if a pet in your book is "different" in this way too...(laughs)
So far, only the hermaphrodite earthworm comes close to LGBT themes in the book. (laughs) But on the publisher's website, where the book is on pre-sale until 10 June 2020, readers can also buy various special rewards. Thanks to one of them, they can "sneak" a pet of their choice into the book. And that can be a gay wild boar (laughs) or even a transgender chameleon...
Because of the coronavirus you had to cancel the author readings, but did you manage to get any feedback from the parents or grandparents of the children? After all, they're the ones who will be reading the book to the children and possibly "explaining" it...
When I started to promote the book, many adults started to contact me with their stories. In fact, they are proof of what I said in the introduction - that the effects of childhood bullying are carried with people into adulthood. For example, one now grown-up lady had children laughing at her for having red hair, spraying her with spray and then trying to set her hair on fire. Although this took place in primary school, the effect on later psychological development, self-esteem etc. is the same as if it had happened in kindergarten. Miss, now a lady, currently has a young daughter, also a redhead. Although she is very happy to have a healthy child, she says there is not a day goes by when she does not think that one day she will suffer as she did. Bullying leaves scars on the soul for life, children can be really cruel. So we definitely need to talk about it.
So basically your book is a "prevention tool" against bullying among children? Are there any institutionalized programs for this purpose?
On the website of the National Youth Information Center (nicm.cz) there is a directory of all kinds of organizations dedicated to bullying prevention. Be it the Children's Crisis Centre, the Minimising Bullying information portal or various others. While it is of course right that such institutions exist and can help, the main tool for preventing bullying is, in my opinion, education within the family. Not only should parents guide their children to respect others, but they should also teach them self-confidence. I myself am proof that if parents encourage healthy self-esteem in their children, even bullying can be successfully "fended off"...
