What do straight couples do wrong in a relationship? These 5 things they should learn from queer couples
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. That's a saying that applies pretty well to most queer couples. Indeed, gays and lesbians face insults, ridicule, scorn, discrimination and misunderstanding on an almost daily basis - sometimes even from relatives and people in their immediate environment. Despite all these negative experiences, however, same-sex couples seem to live together much more harmoniously than some hetero couples. What is it?
1. Better communication
Unfortunately, without proper communication, it really doesn't work. This cliché is supported by several expert studies. One of them, for example, clearly shows that divorce rates are much lower and slower for people in same-sex unions than for hetero spouses. The results of another study, published in the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, in turn found that gay and lesbian couples work harder to deepen their relationships, both on the loving and the friendly levels. Perhaps the most significant finding, then, is that queer couples are not afraid to speak openly with each other. They have no problem talking about the most sensitive topics, including sex. Of course, understanding is made easier by the fact that both people in such a couple are of the same sex and can therefore understand each other more easily.
2. Better arguments
Probably every normal person tries to avoid arguments if possible, and when there is no other option, we at least try not to escalate the conflict. But as other studies have shown, same-sex couples are better off in this respect too. Unlike hetero couples, they do not attack each other so violently, and when disagreements do occur, gay and lesbian couples find their way back to each other much more pleasantly - often through humour. Queer couples also play fairer - they don't use emotional blackmail and there is more equality.
3. Zero gender stereotypes
This is a purely female thing, that's a male thing. This is exactly how gay and lesbian couples don't think in everyday life. When it comes to running a household, queer couples are better able to divide up their roles and agree on who is going to be in charge that day. A balance in terms of traditional household activities and childcare, for example, contributes to the harmonious coexistence of same-sex couples. Compared to straight couples, queer ones are capable of greater compromise and a fair division of labour.
4. Tolerance in the bedroom
Gay and lesbian couples are also better at tuning in on the same note in the bedroom. The love life of these couples is more stable mainly because the primary goal is not only to receive but also to give. In fact, same-sex couples are motivated to perform better in bed by the arousal of their partners, whereas straight couples tend to achieve orgasm at any cost. But this is the main stumbling block, according to experts. Queer couples are not chasing anything during sex, but they want to enjoy lovemaking to the fullest, so they make sure they focus more on it and give it more time and attention. According to the research, gay and lesbian couples also value the emotional connection on which the relationship and everything that goes with it is gradually built.
5. Honesty and trust
It doesn't matter if it's warm but innocent friendships with ex-partners or if you're considering an open relationship. Without honesty and trust, you won't get along with the person under any circumstances. It's all up to you and the rules you set together.
If you've ever thought that "your" queer friend has been doing suspiciously well for years and is happier, more content and, paradoxically, more carefree than the straight couple around you, you're not crazy. It's basically scientifically proven that gay and lesbian couples are able to maintain more harmonious relationships than straight ones (but there are, of course, a few exceptions). That being said, there are several reasons for this, and if you add in a good dose of humor, perspective, and zest for life, you've got a winner, just like the queer couples you've been quietly envious of.
