"The mask, the bound hands and the distant view." Czechs describe their unconventional sexual fantasies
Sexuality is one of the most intimate parts of human life - and yet it is still spoken of with shame. Yet fantasies are not uncommon. According to surveys, almost everyone has them, and they often become a way to enrich a partner's life, explore one's own desires or better understand oneself. But what do these fantasies look like in practice? Several young people shared their experiences and fantasies with us.
Lucie (26).
Lucie describes how she approached the discovery of her fantasies gradually. "For a long time I didn't really know what I was attracted to. But when I started trying lighter BDSM practices, like bondage or role-playing, it opened up a whole new perspective on sex," she says.
She says it doesn't matter how "extreme" the practices are. "It's subjective - what's too much for one person is exciting play for another. For me, what's important is trust with my partner and being able to try something I don't experience in my normal life - like being in a submissive role for a while, even though I'm otherwise more of a dominant," she adds.
Today, she is not afraid to talk about specific scenarios. "It turns me on, for example, when my partner tells me what to do - and I consciously submit. At work and among friends, I'm the one who makes the decisions. In sex it's the other way around and it's actually liberating. And sometimes what happens is that a simple game becomes something deeper - like a scene where my partner pins me down and I lose control completely. At that point it's not just about physics, it's about trust and psychology."
Gábina (24): "I'm incredibly attracted to anonymity"
Gábina, who has discovered the magic of anonymity for herself, has a completely different fantasy. "The idea of meeting someone wearing a mask excites me terribly. You see the body, you feel the chemistry, but you have no idea who it is. It's strange, but I'm so tempted by the feeling of letting yourself be taken by the unknown," she explains.
It is anonymity, she says, that can open up new possibilities. "When you don't know who's under the mask, you allow yourself to be more adventurous. It opens the door to things you might never have tried otherwise," she says.
For Gábina, the fact that the physical side is not immediately accompanied by a social context is also appealing. "Suddenly you're not worrying about whether it's someone in your neighbourhood, whether they'll want to get in touch the next day. It's just you and the moment. The idea of making love to someone and not knowing what they look like in person is scary and sexy at the same time."
She adds that she has also been inspired by performers who wear masks. "You see the charisma, you see the body, and you don't see the face. That has a lot of power. It's actually an erotic secret."
Peter (28): "Voyeurism helped me understand myself"
Peter admits that his long-standing fantasy has been watching others. "I never thought I'd actually try it one day. But when it happened - as part of a swingers night - I found that it didn't just turn me on physically, but also mentally. I suddenly realised how much I enjoy being an observer and not necessarily the one in the thick of it."
"It's more a way of understanding my sexuality - I enjoy being part of a situation, but in a different role than what is normally expected," he explains.
But he doesn't just stick to watching at swingers nights. "I once got into a situation where my partner suggested we try something harder - like fisting. I was surprised that it actually turned me on, and that we both felt completely open. It wasn't about pain, but about intensity and trust. That's the most important thing about harder practices - that you have to listen to each other 100%."
Today, he says the experience broadened his horizons. "I don't go to swingers regularly, nor do I need the harder practices every time. But knowing that I've tried it and that it actually enriched me helps me even in a traditional relationship. I feel more open, more accepting of my partner's fantasies."
Klara (31): "Power play can be gentle and hard at the same time"
For Klara, the power dynamic is appealing. "My partner and I like to try out what he will do when one of us has the upper hand. Sometimes it's just small things - like deciding when he's allowed to touch me. Other times it's more complex roleplay, where we agree on a scenario beforehand," he says.
He admits that sometimes they move on to harder scenarios, but communication is always the key. "Power play is not about violence, it's about trust. And as paradoxical as it may sound - there is a great tenderness in that trust," he adds.
Klara describes how fantasies often have a therapeutic dimension for her. But when I find myself in a role where I'm handing over that control, I feel an incredible tension coming off of me. It's actually a form of relaxation for me."
Fantasies are not necessarily a reflection of what people want to experience every day. Rather, they often function as a safe space where they can let loose without having to actually cross their boundaries.
Lucie sums it up simply: "It's not about whether fantasy is normal or not. It's about it bringing us pleasure and being able to talk about it with our partner."
Sexuality comes in many forms and fantasy is inherent to it. Whether it's light BDSM, anonymous masks, voyeurism or harder practices, they have one thing in common - they allow people to be themselves, even if it's in a different role for a while.
